Jasper Whitlock Comes to Ireland
by Gingerandgreen
Summary: Jasper gets no further than Dublin airport cafe before Mary Alice captures his heart. Fun and fluffery in honour and celebration of TwifanG and the crazy friendships Twific have brought me. Only very mildly rated M, I'd let my teens read this.


_**A Twilight fanfic o/s written in honour of the important friendships I have forged within the fandom, and in memory of Mad4Hugh. **_

_**Dedicated to Mary, because no one was writing Jasper the way she wanted him. ;)**_

_**Thanks to Cared for the Irish lilt and the pretty banner.**_

_**All characters and pairings are the property of Twilight author Stephenie Meyer, and no copyright infringement is intended. Rated M for mild sexual references. AH, canon pairings. It's all just a little crazy bit of fun.**_

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

**Jasper Whitlock Comes to Ireland**

**By Gingerandgreen**

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

The queue to get through immigration at Dublin airport was long, but moving quickly. Jasper ran his hand around the back of his neck, lifting the blond hair that was beginning to get too long away from the collar of his button-down. He felt grimy after nine hours on a plane, and he missed his hat. His head felt bare and exposed without it.

He watched the crowd around him in fascination. The two girls in front of him, college girls he reckoned, fussed over their clothing as though they were in a private bathroom, oblivious to anyone else. He caught a hefty eyeful of cleavage when the darker blond lifted her tits to sit more comfortably in the orange bra under her tank. It was a pleasant enough sight, and he smiled before looking away.

Jasper had always meant to travel. That's how he was lucky enough to have a valid passport when the necessity of this trip came up. He wondered whether, had he followed his dream and taken off to see the world between college and starting real life, would he be here now?

Almost certainly not. If Carlisle Cullen, with that fine silver tongue of his, hadn't have talked him into joining him on the ranch – well, Jasper never would've fallen in love with Esme Cullen, that's all.

And if he didn't spend much of the last seven years of his life pining for a woman he would never have, he wouldn't be on this fool trip to Ireland to find her missing cousin now, either.

The man in the glass cubicle who cursorily glanced at Jasper's passport appeared friendly enough.

"What'll it be, business or pleasure?"

Neither, thought Jasper. But he said, "A little of both, I suppose."

"Are ye staying long?"

It didn't escape Jasper's notice that the officer was studying him intently, despite his casual demeanour.

"That all depends on how long the business takes."

The man handed him his documents back and waved him on. "Go on and get started then," he said, already scanning the face of the next man in line.

Emerging into the arrivals hall at a godforsaken hour, where crowds of eager welcome committees scanned the newbies emerging like colts on travel-wobbly legs, Jasper felt at a loss.

There would be no one there to greet him, so he kept his eyes on the ceiling signs, looking for an exit that might give him some purpose. A cup of coffee in a café might be a good start, he decided, and headed over that way.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

Mary Alice slumped down in her seat at the airport café, head in hands. She had no desire for the oily grunge in front of her, but going home would be worse.

Alone. Years and years of dragging her family kicking and screaming through life, and at the tender age of forty-five, Alice had nothing but an empty house to show for it. She had just dropped her last baby at the departure gate to begin his odyssey to Australia, where he would join his older brother. Their sister lived and worked in London, and had done so for six months now. It didn't look as though she was coming home any time soon.

It wouldn't be so bad if Michael was still around. Even though he was living with another woman, at least when they lived in the same small town, there was life to be lived. Their spectacular fights over who took which piece of furniture, which book belonged to whom – well, they were stupid, but they leant meaning to a woman's life none-the-less.

She cast her eyes over the few travellers stopping to refuel, idly wondering what brought them to Dublin International at 6.30 am. She came to an abrupt halt when she spied the manna sitting at a table across the way.

Holy Mary Mother of God, the man was gorgeous. Feckin' gorgeous, so he was.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

"Are you lost, Love?"

Jasper was startled from his reverie by a voice so soft and sweet, it could have risen from one of his dreams.

"I beg pardon Ma'am?" He just wanted to hear the voice again, but when he lifted his eyes from the guidebook in his large hands, he was startled by a kind of recognition. The woman staring kindly down at him – dazzlingly blue eyes; pale, smooth skin; short, dark hair – was absolutely new to him; but she seemed familiar, like a strong case of _deja __vu._

Alice felt a little like her namesake, falling down the rabbit hole. She was certain this was the cowboy of her fantasies. She would like to say dreams, but Alice reckoned that dreams involved hope – and she had no hope of anything with the tanned, crinkle-eyed Adonis unexpectedly adorning the airport café.

When he opened his mouth and that lilting accent emerged – when he called her ma'am – well, her knees trembled. She would never admit that to anybody.

"I wondered whether you were lost. I've been watching you scratch your head over a dozen printouts and that useless looking guide for half an hour. Can I help?"

Jasper was surprised to find himself contemplating a number of things this pretty woman could help him with. Yes indeedy.

"I booked into this guest house, and I was trying to work out the best way to get to it. Also, I can't check in this early in the day, but I was thinking they might let me drop my bags off..."

He trailed off at the look of pity on the stranger's face.

"You don't want to stay there Love. That's nasty. There're plenty of other hotels in town. Do you want me to talk you through them?"

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

"You did _what_?" Mary Alice's young friend and neighbour hissed shrilly at her over the garden wall.

"I couldn't leave him there. He's a darling. And so damn beautiful, Bella. You wait 'til you see him, and tell me you wouldn't have done the very same thing. Even if he murders me in my bed, it would be worth it to have cooked a meal for him first. Besides, I couldn't help myself. It's like it was ordained. I opened my big mouth, and the invitation popped out of its own accord."

"Well I think it's dangerous. What would Michael say if he knew you were picking up strange men at the airport?"

"Who the blazes cares what Michael thinks? Hold your whist, he's coming. Be nice, Bella."

Jasper reached up to doff the hat that still wasn't sitting on his head. He wasn't sure whether it was actually raining, or whether the air was always that moist in Ireland. His hair felt damp, but neither of the two women seemed at all fussed by it. When he drew closer, he could see the basket of wet washing the young neighbour had at her feet.

"Jasper, this is the young one I was telling you about. Her daddy's in the Gardaí, so he'll maybe help you find your friend's cousin. Bella, this is Jasper."

Bella reached a small, delicate hand over the fence. Jasper wasn't sure whether to shake it or kiss it, and ended up doing an awkward clasp near his lips – neither one thing nor the other. Story of his life.

Bella blushed fiercely.

"I don't want to trouble you any Ma'am, but I'd appreciate your help if you can offer it."

Bella's smile grew exponentially at the sound of what she deduced to be Texas in his drawl. She was well aware of Alice's obsession with all things cowboy. No wonder the woman brought him home – he'd be lucky to leave again intact.

"Well, I expect I can persuade my dad to help. If he wants his dinner ready, he'll do what he can." She winked, then blushed again – she didn't want her friend to think she was encroaching on her prey, although she would have, if she'd seen him first. He was fabulous.

Alice interpreted the encounter as flirting on both sides, and accepted it easily. She had no expectations that her own charms would supersede those of her young and beautiful neighbour. She'd have been happy enough to watch them. As a mother of grown-up children, she was used to living vicariously.

Jasper, however, had eyes for no one else.

He found it difficult to believe that he had so easily accepted an invitation to invade a stranger's life. He was shy, painfully so, and his work on the ranch had only encouraged his lack of social skills. His predominant interactions were with the Cullen family and their staff. No wonder he had never been able to tear himself away from Esme's doting care-taking – he never, ever put himself in a situation in which he could meet someone else.

Someone who might actually want him back.

"Bring Charlie round here for dinner, Bella. I'll cook. Will he be off by seven?" Alice remained unaware of the yearning on the young man's face.

Bella wasn't going to argue. At twenty-six, she already felt like an old spinster, cooking and cleaning and seeing to her daddy, while life passed her by.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

Alice flicked and tucked clean sheets on to her son's freshly vacated bed, while Jasper called whoever he could think of in the search for his employer's cousin, Edward. She wondered why the boy's cousin hadn't hopped over here herself if it was such a big deal, but she wasn't complaining.

She ran the hoover over the carpet, emptied the bins and cleaned the adjoining bathroom before she allowed her guest upstairs. Feeling hot and sweaty, she decided a shower couldn't hurt herself.

Jasper was grateful for the opportunity to use the bathroom. He took his time washing and dressing, but was still finished long before his hostess. He wondered what to do with himself. He didn't want to disturb her – she'd been so kind. He couldn't remember ever having been so welcomed anywhere.

He crept quietly out onto the landing, planning to head downstairs in search of coffee.

The latch on Alice's bedroom door was faulty. Slammed several times too often in the height of the divorce and Michael's betrayal, it did not ever stay latched. Having been single for the better part of eight years, it had never bothered Alice.

Jasper could hear a hairdryer blowing, and below that, the gentle tones of Alice singing. Stopping to listen, he suddenly realised that he could see her through the unlatched door. He froze.

She was naked, hairbrush and dryer in her hands as she reached up to tame her wet hair. She was so goddamn womanly. Jasper hardened instantly in his jeans, the shock of the lust he felt overwhelming his inner-gentleman entirely too easily.

He watched in fascination as her heavy breasts swung gently while she danced to her own rhythm. Her hips were round and wide, her belly soft and so fucking feminine. Her bush was wild and untamed, and when she bent to put the hairbrush down, the dark secret between her thighs made his cock pulse with excitement.

He was mesmerised by her uninhibited behaviour. She kept the hairdryer on, lifting each breast and blowing herself under it in turn. Then she parted her legs and blew the dry air there, and Jasper nearly lost it. He slinked backwards on his heels until he felt the door of the bedroom he was sleeping in digging into his spine. Quietly turning the handle, he crept inside and hit the lock.

Another shower – that was exactly what he needed. He turned on the hot water, stripping his long-sleeved t-shirt over his head.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

Dinner was a loud, boisterous affair. Charlie and Bella were as relaxed and at home as they would be in their own house. They fetched and carried, offered Jasper beer, talked nineteen to the dozen. Jasper had a hard time keeping up – Charlie in particular had a strong accent, and a sense of humour so dry, you could use it to mop up a spill.

Jasper's eyes followed Alice around the warm kitchen relentlessly. Charlie had endured Bella's mooning about the American visitor with indulgence; but what he saw was a young man with a crush on his neighbour. He couldn't say for sure if Jasper's interest was returned, but hell, it was high time the poor woman got herself some. He decided to play matchmaker.

"So tell us about this young lad of yours. Have you brought a picture with you?"

"Yes Sir." Jasper fished in his pocket for his iPhone, flicking through a number of Cullen family photos until he found the best one of Edward. "This is him."

"Oh my, you wouldn't kick him out of bed for eating biscuits." Bella often wanted to kick herself for what came unrestrained out of her big mouth.

Jasper chuckled. "I s'pose not. He's certainly popular with the ladies back home, but he's a one-woman man. Always has been."

"Is that why he left? Was he heartbroken?" Bella was a hopeless romantic. No wonder she was still single, at her age.

Jasper smiled. The expression softened his features in a way that made both the women melt - not in their hearts so much as their groins.

"I don't rightly know. I mean, the boy's heart was set on Rosalie – that's her, she's my little sister. They'd been kinda serious all through college, I guess." He pointed out a stunning, leggy blonde.

Bella understood the attraction Edward must have felt. Lucky bitch who had everything – although why on Earth she wouldn't want to hang on to the bronze-haired sex god gazing at her lovingly in the photograph, she had no idea.

"What happened?" Alice ran her finger lightly over the screen. Jasper fought the urge to kiss the slender digit.

"Rosalie fell in love with a Cullen. It's a common occurrence."

"The Cullens are your employers?" This was from Charlie. His policeman's brain was knitting the pieces of the story together. "Doesn't that make Edward a Cullen?"

"No Sir, Edward's a Masen. He's Esme's cousin. That's her right there." He flicked to another picture, one of Esme on her own this time, staring knowingly at the camera. There was a story in her expression, alright.

"Esme Cullen is married to – what was his name again?" Charlie's suspicion was aroused. He didn't want Alice getting together with a philanderer, even if it was only a holiday fling.

"Carlisle. He's my boss. Look, here's a family photo. This was Thanksgiving last year." Jasper had snapped the picture as a way to look occupied while the couples around him had made lovey-dovey eyes at one another.

Carlisle and Esme looked like two teenagers in love, even Jasper could see that. They had their arms around one another, and they stared into each other's eyes as though no one else was in the room. Hell, the whole world even. Emmett had a girlfriend with him, but his eyes were on Rosalie. She was entwined in Edward's arms, but didn't look as comfortable there as she ought to. Funny how a holiday brought all the feelings out in people. That was probably the last time Edward and Rosalie had actually been happy together.

"Rosalie split with Edward, and he must have been upset, because he left the country without telling anyone."

"Aww, poor dear." Alice loved a love story as much as Bella did. "Who's he looking for again?"

"His natural father. Edward Masen, senior."

"Holy God, I know him!" Every head in the room swivelled to stare at Bella, bouncing excitedly in her seat. "He's in the nursing home – you know, Da, the old fella who pretends to read every book I take down there on a Wednesday. The one you think wants to be my sugar daddy!"

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

When Charlie and Bella left that night – several bottles of wine and a half bottle of whiskey later – a plan for the following day had been formulated.

Bella and Alice whispered together at the door, while Charlie grabbed Jasper by the elbow.

"Be good to that woman, Mr Whitlock. She's been on her own a long while, and she deserves some happiness in her life, if you get what I'm saying to ye."

"Yes Sir," replied Jasper, though he actually had no idea at all. Was the policeman warning him off or encouraging him? He was clueless, as usual.

The door shut behind them, and without the noisy neighbours, the silence was deafening.

Alice wasn't quite sure what to do. "Do you have every thing you need then, Jasper?"

"Yes Ma'am." His reply was quiet and thoughtful. He sure was out of practice at seducing a woman.

"Well, I'll say goodnight so." Alice couldn't quite keep the note of disappointment out of her voice. "Come and find me if you need anything."

"Thank you Ma'am. I will."

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

As soon as she was alone in her bedroom, Mary Alice flipped open her laptop and loaded up Twitter. She needed her Girls, and she needed them badly. She hoped to high heaven someone other than Bella was online.

** IloveaCowboy ** Said bye 2 my baby boy at the airport and brought home a Cowboy instead. What shld I do?

** GeorgiaDarling **Say whut now?

** IrishSwan ** Squuuuueeeeeee! I knew you fancied him! He's DIVINE ** GeorgiaDarling IloveaCowboy **

** IloveaCowboy **Hush you ** IrishSwan **you fancy him too. ** GeorgiaDarling **

** RaunchyVamp **This sounds too good. G-chat Girlz, stat! ** GeorgiaDarling IloveaCowboy IrishSwan **

And so ensued a discussion into the wee hours. The shape of Jasper's arse, his flawless manners, Charlie's declaration to Bella that the young man had a crush on his hostess the size of Texas...

By 3.30 am, Alice was overwhelmed. She said goodnight, flipped off her light and tried to settle into sleep.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

At 4.00 am, Jasper awoke from a restless dream. The sheets were knotted around his long legs, and the stuffiness in the room felt stifling.

He rose and strode to the window, feeling disconcerted by the narrow view bathed in streetlight outside. The houses on this road were so close together, it was no wonder the neighbours all knew each other's business.

Twisting the latch, he threw the window open wide – only to be startled by a loud, electronic wailing. What the fuck?

Alice was jolted out of her erotic dreams by the house alarm. She must have forgotten to tell Jasper, feck it. She stumbled sleepily into her robe as she dashed to the box, punching in the code and grabbing her phone as she did so.

Realising she had to make sure Jasper was alright before she called Charlie, she flipped his door open. He was standing guiltily by his bedroom window, staring at her intrusion with wide eyes. It took a long moment for Alice to understand that he was gloriously naked.

The phone rang in her hand as they stared at each other. She answered without looking away.

"We're grand Charlie. Thanks all the same. Sorry to bother you." She barely heard Charlie's grunt as she disconnected.

Jasper had attempted to cover up his junk with the curtains, but he felt ridiculous, so he just let the material slide away.

"Sorry, Mary Alice. I didn't know the windows were ..."

"Not at all. Sorry for not telling you. And, er, sorry for just barging in..." She made no move to leave.

The blond hair on his lean torso gleamed in the dull, yellow light. Alice wanted to run her fingers through it. She wanted to trace the path down his body to the heavy mass between his legs. A mass that she couldn't help noticing was beginning to swell. And twitch.

Jasper decided to be brave. After all, she hadn't run yet. "Now that you're here, though – are you staying?" He tilted his head to one side, contemplating her response. A lopsided, hopeful smile graced his narrow lips.

"Do you want me to?" Alice's recent online discussion made her brave, or braver than she would have been.

Jasper gestured to the obvious evidence of what he wanted. "Yeah. I really do."

"Fine so." Alice's voice was a whisper now. She really, really wanted him, too.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

The visit to the nursing home where Bella performed her librarian duties on a weekly basis was delayed, unsurprisingly; but only by an hour or so.

The receptionist greeted the group, headed by Bella, with a smile. "Oh sure, Mr Masen's in the garden. He already has a visitor, mind. Don't go chasing him away."

Bella rolled her eyes. Excitement settled at the base of her spine. She led the group, Jasper and Alice shyly holding hands, Charlie smirking at the rear, through the warren of corridors out to the wide and pretty garden.

She spied Mr Masen sitting, legs wrapped in a blanket, at the white metal table on the furthest corner of the patio. His visitor, bronze hair shining in the very mild sunshine, sat with his back towards them.

"C'mon you lot, That's yer man over there."

They fell silent as they walked up to the two Masens, as Jasper was certain he recognised Edward. He wasn't sure, now that he'd found him so easily and unexpectedly, what he was going to say.

"Hello there, Mr Masen," sang Bella, excited to meet the good-looking young man from Jasper's photos.

"Sweet Jesus, here she is!" exclaimed the elderly gentleman.

Edward turned, laid eyes on the brunette beauty his father had been telling him about, and leapt to his feet, knocking his chair over in the process.

"Well don't hurt the girl, you haven't even spoken to her yet. Bella Swan," the old man lifted a trembling hand towards her, "I'd like you to meet my son, Edward Junior. I was just telling him all about you, so I was. He's perfect for you, Dear. Don't take too long on the courting, I want to attend your wedding before I leave this mortal coil."

"Dad!"

"Mr Masen, really, I..."

"Now just hold on there, Son. This isn't the bloody dark ages..."

"Go on, Bella, do it! Marry the man..."

In amongst all the shrieking and kerfuffle, Jasper quietly cleared his throat, catching Edward's eye for the first time.

"Jasper? What the hell? What are you doing here?"

"Esme sent me."

"Esme? Why?"

"Oh, I don't know – maybe because you left without a word, and half the goddamn County was out looking for you? Rose is upset, but Esme was really worried."

"Let's sit down," interrupted Alice, who ached very pleasantly in places she'd forgotten she had. "Mr Masen, who do you have to sleep with to get a cup of tea around here?"

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

Bella was certain they were about to be kicked out of the nursing home. Despite Mr Masen's gentle teasing, she couldn't take her eyes off Edward for a minute. She was scared they would be separated by the progression of events, and she would never see the beautiful man again.

For his part, Edward was inclined to agree with his father. Although the man had abandoned his mother and himself at a young age, he thought perhaps this exquisite girl was the one thing the old man could give him. True Love.

"Bella, can I talk to you for a minute?"

His low voice with its Southern drawl set Bella's knickers on fire. She crossed her legs, before realising he meant her to take a walk with him.

"Oh, yeah, sure. Let's walk around the garden."

They slipped away, walking closely together. Jasper watched nervously from his chair, but when he turned towards Charlie, he was relieved to see a big grin on the affable man's face.

"That," Charlie pointed towards Edward's face, "Was the exact same expression I wore when I met Bella's mother, God rest her soul. It was love at first sight, whether you believe in it or not, Mr Whitlock."

Jasper watched as the sunshine and shadows played across Alice's face and hair. "If I didn't believe in it before," he said, "I do now."

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

That evening, Alice cranked up her laptop again. She checked her email first, hoping for an update on a fanfiction story due that day. Instead, she found an email from one of her best friends in the popular Cowboys and Vampires fandom.

Expecting to find demands for an update on her progress with her very own Cowboy, she clicked on it eagerly.

**To:** ** IloveaCowboy**

**From: GeorgiaDarling**

**Re: Twilight on the Irish Prairie?**

**Darling, my heart is in my mouth. I had a phone call from my soon-to-be MIL today, and guess what she told me? MY OWN EFFING BROTHER HAS GONE OFF TO IRELAND WITHOUT TELLING ME TO FIND MY EX IDIOT BF!**

**For the love of all that is holy, Mary Alice, tell me that your EFFING COWBOY is not my brother! Please?**

**Or, OMFG, if it is my brother, SQUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEEEE! OMG, OMG, OMG you can all come out for the wedding! Where's Bella?**

**Rosa Leigh – yeah, that's not actually my name you know – it's ROSALIE EFFING WHITLOCK! Ring any bells?**

"Jasper? Are you finished in the bathroom? Could you come here a minute and read this please?"

"Yes Ma'am."

He walked out of the steaming bathroom with a towel wrapped enticingly low around his hips.

"What's this, Darling?"

"An email. Jasper, is this an email from your sister?"

"You know Rosalie? How did she get... Oh, my word, Mary Alice, are you one of those crazy Twilight on the Prairie fans?"

"What if I am?" Alice's tone was defensive. She got enough flack from her friends and family – she didn't need it from her lover, too.

"You know my sister! She's a complete Twilight freak – okay, which one is it?"

"What do you mean?" Alice felt tears prick the back of her eyes. _This is ridiculous_, she thought. _I don't have to justify my interests to this man._

"Are you into Leigh the cowboy or George the vampire? Because I can't compete with that rich fucker, excuse my language Darlin'; but I can hold my own against the cowboy dude. Which one is it, Mary Alice?"

Alice started laughing. Jasper sounded so frantic, it was almost as though he believed a fictional character was some kind of competition for him.

"Sweet Jesus, Jasper, it's the fecking cowboy! It's Bella's in love with the vampire, that's why we're such good friends – we don't have to share!" She cracked up, holding her sides so hard she thought she had better nip to the loo before she embarrassed herself any further.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

_Six months later..._

"Edward, you can put Bella down now. I promise you, no bridesmaids will be harmed in the making of this Twilight-themed bridal shower. Now git! Go play with the boys." Rosalie turned her wide, smokey-blue eyes to Alice. "I swear to all that's holy, Alice, that boy never kissed me like that once, in all the years we went out together."

Alice laughed. "It's amazing Charlie hasn't shot the boy yet. Where's Esme?"

"Jasper's bringing her over. Aw, now Darlin', don't you start. I'll never be able to prise my brother off of your lips if you let him in. Nuh-uh!" Rosalie stamped her foot, almost snapping the heel off her pretty, pretty shoes. She needed to get a grip on herself and calm down.

"How many of the gang are coming?" Alice thought it best to take Rosalie's mind off her brother, and any other men for that matter.

"There'll be about thirty of us, can you believe that? And you would not believe what Esme got me as a pre-wedding present."

"What? What? What?" Bella was as excited as Rosalie for this shower. She was going to meet some of her best online friends in the flesh for the first time, and she could barely keep her feet on the ground.

"Lookey here!" Rosalie threw open the door to the enclosed patio and there they were – life-sized and beautiful.

"She got you both? I can't believe it. Don't they look grand," said Alice, head cocked to one side in frank appraisal.

"Pictures!" Rosalie squeaked, nabbing a camera from a nearby table. "Alright, Bella, you stand next to Georgey Vampire boy; and Alice, you snuggle up there to Cowboy Leigh. Holy Mary Mother of God, don't you ladies look a sight."

She snapped away, while her two friends posed next to the life-sized cardboard cut-outs of the actors that had brought them together.

This was going to be the best bridal shower ever. Scrap that – best real life love story ever, ever, ever.

x.x.x.x.x.x.x.

_**I would so appreciate it if you left me a review, even if it only contains one word. Thanks for reading, beautiful people. Take care of yourselves.**_


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